Puns, groaners, whatever. Well worth wasting the time to read them. 1. A bicycle can’t stand alone; it is two tired. 2. A will is a dead giveaway. 3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. 4. A backward poet writes inverse. 5. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion. 6. [...]

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Although the Aussies speak a dialect of the Queen’s English, only an Aussie would understand what’s below. You know you’re an Australian if: 1. You know the meaning of the word “girt”. 2. You believe that stubbies can be either drunk or worn. 3. You think it’s normal to have a leader called Kevin. 4. [...]

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Prepositions are not words to end sentences with. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive. Avoid clichés like the plague. (They’re old hat) Also, always avoid annoying alliteration. Be more or less specific. Remarks in brackets (however relevant) are (usually) (but not always) unnecessary. Also too, [...]

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